It’s not easy surviving on the miserly pay i get every month. Thus, i’m trying to go on a budget spree these days. Oxymoron, i know. Friday night was spent at taka food court with boons and weims, and we even bought drinks from cold storage. So secondary school. Hahaha.

Anyway, pris, simin, sha and kat came along. We played this who-am-i game where we were supposed to think of any person/place/thing under the sun and write it on a piece of paper. We  would then exchange and stick our ‘identity’ on our foreheads, and we were supposed to ask questions like ‘am i a male or female’ or ‘am i a food’ and all. Very strangely, coincidentally and amazingly, boons and i both wrote Coco Chanel for each other!!! Oh my gosh.

I actually sacrificed my precious saturday sleep-in for a workout at the gym. The branch at Vivo is niceeeee. Running on the treadmill while overlooking the sea (despite the cranes) is quite an experience, i say.

On a random note, i really really love the smell of coconut oil.

watching hall video today makes me realize how easy it is to forget. i almost forgot how it felt to be so passionate about hall, about the things i do, about IHG, about winning, about dancing, about the people around me.

thank goodness there are always videos and photos to digitalize and capture the moments.

you are simply not interested ain’t it.

had a fun friday night out with the girls at china one. i hadn’t danced in a long long time. very tempted to drink and dance the whole night away one fine day.

had five hours of hard core shopping with char today. i suddenly find fun in going out on a saturday. oh my poor legs.

goodbye

Yesterday was my last tuition session. We’ll never be able to stop life’s incessant goodbyes huh?

I am having a difficult time perfecting life’s imbalances and role reversals. There are just so much to behold, and thus, so much we could miss. Sometimes the things we are holding on to, it may be best to let them go. Yet the selfishness in you just wants to hold on to them forever.

I seriously don’t know what to do with life.

randomness

have been trying to revive my blog of late, something that had always been a part of me. if only friendships are so easy as well.

i could never handle expectations well. i have too high expectations of people at times, and i always get disappointed in the end. yet without expectations, it means i don’t care anymore. i am so contradictory, ain’t i.

I never mentioned i like my colleagues at work. Not the young, go-have-drinks-together sort of colleagues, but nice, helpful seniors who are always available to explain serious work or have a chat with. They are actually part of the reason why i took up the offer (had them as interviewers). And have i already mentioned there is a nespresso corner at my office besides the old ugly pantry? had a nice little coffee session with my french team leader this morning. i realize it’s a great temporary getaway from busy busy work. a bit no reason for lowly graduate interns to congregate there to take a break, so i think i’ll do that when i get more acquainted with the surroundings a few months down the road. hee hee.

oh i digressed. my point is, the people in my team are nice. i like the other team leader whose office i sit directly outside too. now what is going to happen if i decided the job scope is not for me or the job is not well paid..

i really don’t know.

yay. i think i am finally going to hear my cute boyfriend’s voice since last week.

quarter life crisis

Unmotivated. Uninterested. Unloved.

The topics revolving around conversations these days, especially with girls (or should i say women), are on marriage, motherhood and career. What happens when you are still single at the age of 30, husbands and extramarital affairs, the complete loss of freedom on entering motherhood, career and prospects.

Is it a little too depressing to talk about all these at the age of 23, or is it societal pressue today?

Speaking of which, entering this new phase of life is not at all exciting. Or have i concocted too many idealistic notions about what my life is going to be? i swear i still dream of strutting down the busy streets of a foreign land in fashionable coats and leather boots. Other times i vision myself sitting in a cosy cafe at a quaint corner, sipping coffee with the love of my life. Now there’s only ugly crowded Raffles Place, the less occasional Starbucks (trying to survive on the Nespresso machine in my office), and webcaming with my boyfriend in Shanghai is some sort of luxury. Don’t tell me a banker’s life is all glitz and glamour, because it has been proven to be a huge misconception. Unless you mean the traders and investment bankers. Working life can be so boring. No wonder the only saving grace is the alcoholic retreat thereafter.

In fact, i have been thinking a lot about what i really want to do. I reckon a desk bound job is not my cup of tea. I like to talk, discuss and build on ideas with people. I believe in taking occasional breaks and feeling recharged (sitting in front of the computer the entire day does not make you more productive). I don’t like phone calls (except with willie) because i cannot hear very well. What if i miss an important detail? Or a crucial decision?? I don’t mind meeting new people, i don’t mind travelling from place to place. I would love to be very busy and productive, yet not bring any work home. I believe i can work well like that. Any such jobs?

my boy!

in simplicity

i kind of enjoy the soothing, slow rainy mornings in the CBD.

it’s like an oxymoron.

and then you want to take a step back, feeling silly to fret over life’s many conundrums.

anyway, happy seven months my love. i am trying to wish you in every possible medium.

“i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u i miss u i love u”

seems like a perfect background for an imperfect night.